Sunday, May 11, 2014

Happy Mother's Day Momo

Assalamualaikum..
Hai semua..
Hari ni hari ibu.. tak pernah rasa hari ibu yg paling bermakna mcm hari ni.. hari ni, aku belajar erti menghargai n menyayangi ibu..
Semalam, ibu pergi klinik sbb sakit dada.. aku mcm biasa la, think of muscles cramp jer.. masa ibu ckp ibu sakit dada, aku cm x amek serius sgt.. lepastu, angah pergi klinik sbb dia gastric.. so alang2 pergi tu, ibu pon nak check la pasal sakit dada tu.. serius, aku ingat lagi ape aku ckp kat ibu.. " alaa mo nak check ke? Mo kan dh okayy.. sakit lagi ke dada tu??" Mcm x amek serius ttg sakit dada momo tu..
Lps je doc check angah, doc check momo.. lps dgr history taking, serius momo punya simptom mcm sakit dada smpai ke tengkuk n bahu kiri seakan2 Myocardial infarction.. aku makin panik bila doc tekan kaki mo utk check for pitting oedema n it's positive.. momo ade pitting oedema! Which might suggest of heart failure.. jantung aku luruh masa tu.. xtau nak ckp ape dahh.. doc pon suh momo buat ECG, doc suspect mo prnah ade serangan sblm nih.. yaAllah, hati aku makin cuak.. aku dh nak nangis.. as a medical student, i know better d consequences compared to other family members yg still terpinga2 melihat aku n momo kuar dari bilik doc.. paling menakutkan, doc mintak refer hosp secepat mungkin.. takut2 momo bleh kena serangan jantung lagi :'(
Aku, cuba kuatkan semangat.. air mata boleh mencurah bila2 masa.. tapi aku tau, klau aku nangis, org lain jadi lagi risau.. aku tahan! Bila rasa nak nangis, kupandang ke tempat lain, aku cuba utk berborak2.. tp aku tau, riak muka aku xdpt disembunyikan.. semua fikiran negatif ade dlm otak masa tu..
Malam tu, pulang shj ke rumah, sebaik ibu n abah dh melelapkan mata, aku ke bilik mengurung diri.. deraian air mata yg tadi kutahan akhirnya mengalir.. bengkak jugak mata.. bila fikir tentang momo.. mcm mana momo berbakti utk kami adik beradik.. kenangan terimbau satu per satu.. lps solat, aku cuba tidur.. tapi x boleh.. aku tidur sebelah ibu.. utk memantau keadaan ibu.. yelah, klau org yg ade heart failure, dia xboleh nak tido, sesak nafas..
Alhamdulillah mo nampak okay.. tidur bertemankan spongebob kegemarannya..
Tengah malam itu, aku terjaga.. aku nampak abah bangun, memeriksa keadaan mo.. dlm bayang gelap, aku nmpk abah melutut di sisi momo, meletakkan kepalanya ke sisi momo.. sedih bila tengok.. mcm mana kasih abah kpd momo..
Hari ini.. hari ibu..
Aku n abah bawa ibu ke hospital utk pemeriksaan lanjut...alhamdulillah
ECG: normal
Auscultation: normal
Cardiac marker: troponin I -ve
Pitting oedema: because of long time standing
Alhamdulillah..ini hadiah terbaik buat momo.. terima kasih Allah, masih ade peluang utk kami berbakti kpd momo.. semoga momo, abah, angah, ipah n arep sentiasa diberkati Allah dan dipanjangkan usia.. amin ya rabbal alamin :')

Monday, March 31, 2014

Would my dream come true?

Assalamualaikum n good morning..
Wow it's 7:21 and I already woke up!
I can hear the birds chirping through the window.. aaaa so nice to get up early! InsyaAllah, looking forward to change my habit :)

Oh yeah.. my dream!!!
It's not about my dream to be something or someone.. it's really a dream.. u know dreaming while sleeping.. hehehehe

I dont know whether i should tell about this or not cos when we told someone about our dream,it won't come true.. that's my belief.. hehehe.. myth?? It's okay i am still going to tell it here.. cos i had been dreaming of this guy so many times!!!!!!!!

Woah.. a hint! "A guy"!
Yup I dreamt of this one guy for so many times.. approximately 3-4x..
Yup not that much but if you had been dreaming of this one guy in a period of about 3months,is it not weird enough?

Everytime I meet him in my dream, he smiled and talked to me like nothing happened before between us. Gahhhhhhhh -.- i hate this..
Oh btw, the one in my dream was my ex-bestfriend in my high school.. yup a male bestfriend.. we had a big fight before and never talked or contacted each other since 4yrs ago.. cause of the fight?? Too long to tell it here.. but seriously i just HATE him for his ego..
Okay back to my dream.. i didnt remember everything but i just can tell that i was so shocked everytime he spoke to me.. as it really unbelievable.. but he was still smiling and talked to me like he used to be before we had a fight..ahhhh it would be really nice if we can be bestfriends again :')))

So i referred to tafsir mimpi in google.. as usual.. hahahaha..
It is said that if u dream of your old friends, meeting him/her in a happy mood,it means that he/she misses you.. it could also be that the dreamer misses his friend.. seriously???? I didnt miss him.. i didnt even think of him before I slept.. I didnt contact him!!! Haihhhh
Is he missing me??? Nahhh who knows? Dia takde contact aku pon kan!!??
Hmmm..it looks like i already be friend with him in my dream.. okay laaa.. better than never.. at least our soul maybe had met up anywhere and be friends??? Hahahaha..

Oh anyway as i go through the tafsir mimpi.. i found something..
If you dream of getting married, you will get married in 1 or 2yrs..
Yup, i did dream of that last year!!!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!
I got a Pakistani husband in that dream who I didnt even know.. i think it's an arranged marriage.. taknakkkkkk!!!
Aku xmau kawin !!!!!!!! -.-
Okay guys, just be ready to get invitation cards from me in 1 or 2yrs time ==' adoiyaiiii.. i dont want it.. seriously.. tpi mimpi xjadi klau dh citer.. hahahaha :D

Okay lah that's all.. my expression early in the morning! :0
Till then.

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Sem 2 oh Sem 2

Assalamualaikum..

Hey there.. hehehe I dunno why my posts are always related to my exam n results.. hehehe
My Blog. My Place. Expressing Feeling
Gahhhhhh.. -_____- SERIOUSLY!!! I'm freaking out now as we had discussed our exam answers..
TAKUT laaaaa.. camne laaaa nak pass ni!!!
Setakat ni, aku pass la OBA sem 2.. all the others summative assessment pon insyaAllah pass rsenye..
TAPI... OSPE laaaa buat aku gentar ni.. rse mcm banyak salah dahhhh.. xcukup rse nk smpai 50%!! Ottoke??!!!!!
Jgn citer OSCE plak.. seriously takutttt sangat!!!!

Kalau tak pass, either repeat sem or year.. can u imagine that???
Mmg la nak think positively maybe that's d best for me tapi mst malu ar nnt!!!!
Xtau nk letak mne muka.. nnt org prasan kte xde in lectures.. then, new batch mates pon mesti perasan muka2 baru!!! aaaaaarghhhhh!!! >.<

Ya Allah nak nangis rase ble fikir.. huaaaaaa T_T
Ya Allah, kalau itu terbaik utk aku berikanlah aku kekuatan.. tolong laaaaa!!!
Ya Allah, harap2 family aku bleh la terima.. mst sedih nnt sbb dh hampakan ibu n abah T_T

Bismillahitawakkaltualallah..
Wish me luck for this upcoming tuesday.. 1 week left! :'''')